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Questions & Answers

Children

Faith Q&A › Metropolitan Youssef › Marriage and Family › Children

The question

If children are a gift from God, why do some families/single parents treat their children badly whereas 'good' families who desperately want children remain barren?

The answer

Every family (good or bad) should expect to have children: "Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth" (Gen 1:28). But many families (again good or bad) may not have children. This can be attributed to one of the following reasons:
  1. Test of faith
  2. Envy of the Devil
  3. Natural law (diseases)
  4. Discipline by God
  5. Personal sins
In many cases, it could be beyond our understanding why God does not allow good families to have children; while he allows some non good families to have children. But we are sure that God does the best for each child because He is beneficent. Children are a wonderful blessing. Some are sons and daughters of prayer:
  • Isaac, son of Abraham & Sarah: "Now Abraham and Sarah were old, well advanced in age; and Sarah had passed the age of childbearing." The Lord questioned Abraham because when Sarah heard his announcement, she laughed to herself, not believing. "Is there anything too hard for the Lord? At the appointed time I will return to you, according to the time of Life, and Sarah shall have a son" (Genesis 18:10-15).


  • Samuel, son of Elkanah & Hannah: "And she (Hannah) was in bitterness of soul, and prayed to the Lord and wept in anguish." ...'Then Eli (the priest, saw her anguish but did not at first know that she was praying, but after she explained her situation to him, said to her) 'Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition which you have asked of him.' And she said, 'Let your maidservant find favor in your sight" (I Samuel 1:8-18).


  • St. John the Baptist, son of Zachariah & Elizabeth: The Angel Gabriel first appeared to Zachariah, the Priest, and said to him, "Do not be afraid, Zachariah, for your prayer is heard; and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son..." To Saint Mary, the angel Gabriel also announced "Now indeed Elizabeth your relative has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is now the sixth month of her who was called barren. For with God, nothing will be impossible" (Luke 1:36-37).
There are a lot of men and women who have not been biological parents, but because of their great influence, they have been spiritual fathers and mothers to many. For example, St. Antony the Great, the father of monasticism; The Three Saint Makarii and their children the Cross-Bearers, St. Dimiana, and the Forty Martyrs, and many others. You may also include patriarchs, bishops, priests, monks, nuns, and Sunday School servants. These individuals, through the capacity God has given them, have made a service commitment to spiritually help raise children to God. As for why some parents are abusive to their children -- most likely they have many issues which are blocking and distorting their understanding and appreciation of the wonderful blessing of raising a child of God. They need much prayer and enlightenment.

Answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab)

Related questions

Questions answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab) of the Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. Question 1256 on the Diocese’s Q&A site. Questions and answers © Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. All rights reserved.