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Forgiveness

Faith Q&A › Metropolitan Youssef › Spiritual Life › Forgiveness

The question

An unpleasant scenario took place between some friends and me causing much hurt and pain. I have apologized and asked for forgiveness. In turn, I have forgiven them. However, it seems that the others have not forgiven me and would not talk about it nor talk to me. I am finding that I am having episodes of anger against them because of their unwillingness to solve things. Does this mean that I have not truly forgiven them; and that I am fooling myself? Also, should I continue to try to get their forgiveness or do I let them have their space?

The answer

It is difficult to admit an error and take responsibility for it. You have already taken this very important step. When we pray the Lord's Prayer, we ask Him to "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." We cannot ascertain the degree of forgiveness others grant us. Rather, focus on the sins you want God to forgive you. If the mistake you made is repetitive, work on it so it does not become a character flaw. Ask God to help you overcome any residual bitterness you may have in your heart regarding this matter; in order that it does not interfere with your spiritual life. You can give your friends some space but still remain kind and friendly. Continue this dialogue with your spiritual father in confession. Your personal relationship with God is far more important than any other relationship.

Answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab)

Related questions

Questions answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab) of the Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. Question 1372 on the Diocese’s Q&A site. Questions and answers © Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. All rights reserved.