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Masturbation

Faith Q&A › Metropolitan Youssef › Christian Living › Masturbation

The question

I am a 21 year old guy. I have a really close friend who is 18. We talk about everything and trust each other very much, more than brothers. We love God infinitely and go to church weekly. We are deacons and Sunday school servants. We also have two different fathers of confession, but we are dealing, as many others for sure, with the issue of masturbation, no matter how much we fill our day with activities or keep ourselves busy. 

We learned in school that masturbation is important to prevent the risk of prostate cancer and to increase fertility and that it has many other sides which are beneficial for health. When we looked it up on the internet, we noticed that they were right. 

Now as Egyptians and Coptic guys, we were raised up with the mindset that masturbation, sexual, etc. and it is dirty and sinful. We still cannot understand why masturbation is a sin? We could not find it in the Holy Bible and when we talked to our fathers of confession, we did not get a clear answer. We were told that it is an addiction. However, we are not talking about masturbation in a way of addiction but in a normal way. We also cannot understand why God should be against it, to love ourselves? That does not mean we will love Him less. God made us have lust and He gave us the feeling of sexual desire. Of course, we should not be like animals driven by lust but in a controlled way. 

In the former days, people married at a very young age, which is not the case nowadays. People now marry at a quite older age. So, how should we manage that? Why should we fight against natural needs? Why do some fathers of confession take it more easily than others? Some say it is okay to do it at that age and when marriage comes, it will decrease alone. Some say, no, it is a huge sin, and are very strict. What is right now? Why are there different opinions? Is it a cultural issue?

I ask you please for a clear answer and explanation, because this topic confuses us and depresses us with the desire to do it, because we still do not understand whether it is a sin or not and why?

The answer

Masturbation is a sexual activity, which increases arousal and relieves sexual desires. According to the Holy Bible and the teachings of the Church, normal sexual activity is blessed within the context of Holy Matrimony, and excludes masturbation, pornography, sexual paraphernalia, and oral and anal sex. According to a study by John Hopkins (2021), age, race, and genetics are the highest risk factors in prostate cancer. Improving one's diet, maintaining a healthy weight, regular exercise, quitting smoking, minimal alcohol intake, and increase in Vitamin D, are the recommendations to reduce risk of prostate cancer. Studies regarding staying sexually active are still ongoing and only state some theories. There is no evidence that masturbation, whether by a teen or someone in his twenties or older, is recommended (https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/prostate-cancer/prostate-cancer-prevention).

Masturbation can become an addiction and some men have continued in this behavior well after marriage. This factor has been the cause of some collapsed marriages. Masturbation usually requires mental stimulation of sexuality, promiscuity, and other obscene imagery, but lacks the expression of love toward one's spouse. Thus, it is driven by lust and results in sexual immorality. It is normal to have these urges, especially in the teen years when a boy begins to discover his body and his sexual desires. It is true that in modern society, people postpone marriage often until their thirties. Nonetheless, masturbation is not the only solution. One needs to channel his energy toward productive activities and avoid becoming self-absorbed and regressing to masturbation as the only source of relief.

Answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab)

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Questions answered by His Eminence Metropolitan Youssef (opens in a new tab) of the Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. Question 2397 on the Diocese’s Q&A site. Questions and answers © Coptic Orthodox Diocese of the Southern United States. All rights reserved.